Einfach oder hin und zurück?

I haven't been posting anything since high school...
I don't know how I am back here. Just had lots of thoughts about yesterday. I am already at the end of my Sophomore year. Finals are next week. 2014 is soon to be over. Many things have changed since... I hope for the better. I think I will come back to this blog soon.

Einfach oder hin und zurück?
Einfach, bitter. Not going back but go straight on.

Winter

"It's the most beautiful time of the year. Lights fill the streets spreading so much cheer. I should be playing in the winter snow. But I'mma be under the mistletoe." My favorite season has always been winter. Maybe...it is the influence of living in a place that did not snow for the past 13 years. I lived in Auckland and Saipan throughout most of my life. Auckland's winter is in June and July. However, it does not snow but instead it rains in the cold temperature. Saipan. Saipan is a tropical island which has summer throughout the whole year as it is located on the equator. So...no snow for me. I always wanted a White Christmas which happened only rarely in my life. I wanted to go out in the snow, make snowman and snowballs. Christmas decorations are so beautiful in the snow. I LOVE WINTER CLOTHES. It is so cozy and fuzzy. Winter clothing are way fashionable. I love wearing scarfs and fur jackets. I love drinking hot cocoa in front of the fireplace. I miss the days when I use to eat marshmallows at my house. I love the trees covered in snow that makes it so clear and white. I love the love in the air with all the presents and lights. I love the huge Christmas trees. I love to make angel mark on the snow. I miss tasting the snow. I love watching a movie with layered blankets and hot cup of tea or coffee or cocoa. I just love winter that much. 

Film Review: Cold Souls

“Cold Souls ”(2009, directed and written by Sophia Barthes) is a comedy-drama film based on a philosophical idea of soul storage that was inspired by a dream of Woody Allen’s discovery of his chickpea soul. The film’s plot is about an anxious actor, Paul Giamatti (Paul Giamatti as himself) who extracts his soul after he feels stuck distinguishing his acting character, Uncle Vanya, and himself. The film starts with Paul struggling to express the character and stores his soul as life without it “makes so much more sense.” He becomes disappointed that his soul came out as a tiny chickpea. When his 95% of his soul is stored, he goes through troubles in his career and marriage. Then he consumes a soul of a Russian poet that plays the soul’s memories and helps him in Paul’s play. However, a Russian soul trafficking mule, Nina (Dina Korzun), steals Paul’s soul to give it to her boss’s wife, a soap opera actress, whom believes that it is the soul of Al Pacino. Later, Nina helps Paul to get his soul back in Russia and Paul finds out his soul donor has committed suicide. After reconnecting with his soul, Paul returns to New York happily while he is unable to recover Nina’s soul.   

Barthes is praised for its cinematography in portraying and analyzing the complex and philosophical idea of extracting souls. The scenes are balanced with bright and dark lights that helps the audience to contrast the scenery and see the visual differences of reality and fantasy. He also uses dark lighting for reality of the night life in the Paul and Nina’s rooms. When Paul looks into his donor’s soul, Barthes uses blurry bright lights that makes the effect of the scene. Barthes does not significantly change the mood of the film after Paul extracts his soul. Paul does not show much of a free life from worries and trouble. Paul is in a constant trouble and is going through bizarre situations of changing souls. Therefore, Paul shows his complex emotions through confusion and unconsciousness. Barthes clearly shows the bizarre situations by the meeting of Paul and the soul doctor, Dr. Flintstein (David Strathairn). The soul doctor contrasts Paul as the doctor is serious about the whole soul extraction process while Paul is dumbfounded. The editing of the film is somewhat rough that uses many different angles in small scenes. When Paul looks into his soul, he walks in a place where there are bald people and sees a pregnant woman, baby and a little boy. The sharp editing of this scene makes the perfect effect  of uncertainty and the  complex character of Paul. Also Barthes clearly depicts the cold weather of Russia with the icy setting and Paul’s hat.

“Cold Soul” won and received many awards from film associations and film festivals. At the Independent Spirit Awards, the film was nominated for best cinematography and  best first screenplay. Also, Dina Korzun was nominated for best supporting female.The budget for the film is low and the gross is around $900,000 (www.imdb.com). It is an odd movie that brings a new kind of feel in the categories of film. As Paul looks into his soul to solve his problem, it is a good didactic film that shows the audience to understand their own struggle in life and shows the uniqueness and necessity of souls. It is a soul searching comedy that is rated PG-13 for nudity and brief strong language. 

Film Review: 50/50

“50/50”(2011, directed by Jonathan Levine) is a film based on the a inspired true story of the screenwriter Will Reiser. The film’s plot is about an ordinary man, Adam Lerner (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), a 27 year old radio journalist, who finds out that he has cancer in his spine that has survival rate of 50/50. The film starts with healthy Adam jogging in the morning in which foreshadows his back pain. After he finds out that he has cancer, he goes through conflict with himself. He goes through shock, denial, resistance, and acceptance.  Levine clearly illustrates the unique and odd characteristics of the characters: anxious and controlling mother (Anjelica Huston), vulgarizing best friend Kyle (Seth Rogen), disloyal girlfriend Rachel (Bryce Dallas Howard) and inexperienced therapist Katherine McKay (Anna Kendrick). He tries to find imminent comforts in marijuana and sex. However, he overcomes the struggle as he realizes that the importance of relationships with his close people. In the end, tumor is successfully removed and Adam goes on a date with his therapist, Katherine. 

Levine is praised for its cinematography in perfectly portraying and analyzing Adam’s life. The scenes are usually bright lighting that fits the setting of the normal daily life of an American man at his work and the hospital. He also uses dark lighting for reality of the night life in the club and the streets. The changing mood of the effects from camera and editing perfectly contrasts the life before and after having cancer. Kyle assists him in getting high and getting “laid.” Levine uses comedy by using sexual jokes and strong usage of profanity while sticking to the main cancer thesis. When Adam first hears his cancer diagnosis, Levine shows the common effect of the shock by muting the sound and focusing on the dumbfounded face of Adam. Levine uses one take when Adam shaves his head in which shows the effect of no turning back. With the explicit languages and expressions, Levine portrays the different characteristics of each character. He clearly shows the reality of the awkwardness between people by not placing background music. For example, audience can feel the awkward conversation between Adam and Katherine. By progressing in the natural steps of the cancer reactions, the audience is able to see the change in Adam.  These depictions shows the true effect of how painful cancer is like with chemotherapy. By showing Adam’s friends with cancer, mom going to support group, and Kyle and Katherine helping him, Levine shows that Adam is not alone in the fight. In the end, Adam gets support from the people he really cares and he realizes that he cannot live without them. Levine uses slow and blurry images to show the affect of drugs in Adam. Although conflicts grow between the relationships, Adam can see that they are his healers. 

“50/50” won and received many awards from film associations and film festivals. At the 69th Golden Globe Awards, Joseph Gordon-Levitt was nominated for Best Actor and the film was nominated for Best Picture. The budget for the film is estimated to be $8 million and the gross is around $35 million (www.boxofficemojo.com). It is a great movie that gives tribute to the patients fighting cancer around the world. The film depicts the fear and chemotherapy that shows that is is indeed deadly. It portrays the difficulties that they experience that has changed them from being ordinary human. “50/50” is a powerful film that leaves the audience with a strong message of relationship as ”it takes a pair to beat the odds”(50/50 tagline). It is a touching films and is rated R for profanity, use of drugs and partial nudity.

Where art thou? My Romeo?

My ideal spouse is ...hm...maybe someone who is somewhat older than me. He has to be a romantic guy. Let me emphasize that. ROMANTIC. If not...forget about it. I don't want a boring marriage life. I want a marriage life that is like going on a first date all the time. It will be nice if he makes many surprise events that lead to another. Maybe giving hints of where we are going to travel next. He has taller than me of course. May be 6 feet will be perfect. The ideal guy would be Sean O'pry. He is hot and gorgeous. He needs a nice stable job that has great salary. I kinda wanna marry an American or European. I dunno if I wanna marry a Korean guy. I dont like those Korean traditional burden thing that daughter-in-laws are obligated to do. Maybe it is influence from what I experienced. I want a laid back parent in laws. I dont want stressful people in family matters. So no no no. My first husband was Junsu Kim (JYJ). He had the best smile and the best voice. So I guess that adds to my list of ideal spouse. My other ideal celebrity spouses are Marlon Teixeira, WonBin, HyunBin, Christian Bale, MinHo Kim and Daniel Henney. 
I want the marriage to be relaxing and affectionate. I dont want the marriage to be so strict or too controlling. There must be some relaxing and free moments in marriage. Sometimes, just let it be. why be jealous of things that is useless. He must be open and understanding. Although he will be sweet, he must be morally right. He must be a musician, able to play guitar and piano. He should not smoke or drink. He has to be a Christian. He must be somewhat liberal but conservative as well. He must not live in Korea cuz I am not living there in the future. I dont really like cooking Korea food. Yes. He must cook. I will bake. House chores should be equally done and taking care of our kids as well. We need to settle down in NYC, San Francisco in US or somewhere in West Europe. He must love dogs cuz I want to have many Siberian Husky! I LOVE THEM so much :) maybe some fat cats too.
I want a guy who will adore and love me. We will grow old together. Seeing old couples always made me so happy. They look so cute together. Where would I find a romantic guy? Italy? Hm... French? LOL In marriage or in any relationship, the guy has to be the guy. I am not gonna be the guy in relationship. I hate when the guy gets mad for something really useless. Come on. Seriously. pisses me off and I am not gonna do anything to make you feel better. My habit when I am mad is that I dont talk. So dont try to piss me off. He has to be honest and should never be dishonest with me. Cheating in marriage is definitely a NO NO. It will be the end if whatever of that happens. He must understand my career and my freedom. I am not gonna be a housewife for sure. love meaning love. not any other love that some men think is love. He must be caring, who is willing to take care of me and be at my side at all time. I dont want my husband to be a baby. Wife is not the one who is raising the husband, she is suppose to raise to kid. Therefore, he has to be mature. mature. mature. 

Graduation

Our graduation is 16 days away. Already four years of high school years are ending. It's been like fast-forwarding a part of a movie. It has gone so fast. too fast. for my brain to store up the precious memories. We have to have a great after-party and have an awesome day at Senior Trip. We are having our graduation at World. I think I have to give a speech. Ah... I dont wanna graduate somewhat. But I wanna go to college and start a new chapter in life. It is really odd. Now I have to live by myself. I am gonna miss my family alot. I am going to miss my Seniors so much as well! Best class that anyone would have wished for. We are the most awesome bunches. We have Cool Kind Sei, Violent Unni Taekhan, Dongfei Dong Hyun, Mario Tony, Hahahah TM, Beautiful Lani, Artistic Amy, Humorous Jiaying, Funny Cute Minjoo, Mango Alice, Smart Jellyfish Amber, Gorgeous Zoe, Kind Andy, Quiet Elegant Jian, Mickeymouse Gusling, Sexy Shane, Tall Serious Richard, Handsome boy Jaehee. We are the most colorful class ever. Our Seniors are so adorbs. I just love them so much. We had so much memories together! Ahh... It is going to be a very touching ceremony. I guess all the girls are gonna cry. and the boys too. I dont think we are even getting speaker for our graduation. The Ushers are Jeonghwan and Raffy. D'awwww. But I wish that teachers will not give us so much homework during our last days of school. Seriously. I am tired and exhausted. We have 3 AP Exams...and musical coming up. I am gonna miss everyone...maybe there will be an exception. But still love you guys.  Muahhhh. Just waiting for the moment to throw away my cap into the air. That will be a nice shot.

Midnight in Paris

Midnight is Paris was my last prance. It was held on 4.21.2012 at Pacific Islands Club. But i was not the best prance. However, it was pretty nice. The photo room and stage were decorated with balloons. I wished we had the photographer and the party bus. I liked the slow dance but it was tooo short!! I wished the time stopped when we slow danced. It was sad. Ms Mili gave a short speech for our awesome Senior Class. Our class picture looks so adorbs. Our after party FAILED. like really and truly. We booked it beforehand but did not know the age had to be over 21. So we were stuck outside in our cars...waiting for a solution. We went to Andy's house. It was quite fun. But I wish we got Marianas and the party bus even though it costs more. Cheapest way isnt the only best way. Plus we didnt have Senior Trip. Why didnt we spend it on prance? Argh.... so frustrating. Our graduation afterparty has to be perfect!!!! Ayways... it was the most G-rated party ever! :D We are goodie goods. Seriously. Unlike some people who doesnt trust us. Gosh. Anyways. I teamed up with Jaehee, our class handsome guy, and beat all the boys in the game. Some other people played pool. Then the Korean kids went somewhere for the after after party. I just went home cuz I had to go to church.